Help Needed, but not Wanted

So I've made the first few steps in applying for federal help when it comes to my problems. I spoke to a lawyer and they told me to go ahead and apply for benifits. They expect that I will get denied, and once I do they will take over the case. I don't have to pay anything unless they win, and whatever I owe is taken out of back pay. So that is good.

At this point it is the only option I can see. I am just very tired of all of it myself. Tired of barely being able to live on what I make because the moment something changes with my schedule I freak the fuck out. The moment I have to work just a little bit more I feel like my whole world is crashing in on me. And this is coming from a job that I actually ENJOY doing. I think back to all the jobs I had that I walked out on or quit without notice because I finally couldn't take it anymore and I realize how lucky I am to have a job that allows me to work alone without anyone bothering me with plenty of downtime.